I'm just now realizing why this day has been so BLUE for me ... or at least one of the major reasons (among several).
Today is the first Mother's Day without my mom. She died last July 24 after a 12 year battle w/ Alzheimer's. And my brother, who I rarely hear from (& who rarely saw mom once she got sick), sent me a text message this afternoon today saying: "Hope u r having a nice mothers day. i wish mom was around to see."
Wow, that he is missing mom & had the cajones to admit that to me in a text. Wow, that I didn't realize the significance of today being Mother's Day... though I am often acutely aware of feeling very much the orphan, especially during big Life Events. Wow, that it's been almost a year since she died.
My mom was the most beautiful woman IMO... This pic was taken in the late 1940's when she was in her 20's.
No wonder my dad wanted to marry her. She was smokin' hot y'all! 5'8", blond, violet blue eyes (like Elizabeth Taylor), skinny as a rail, KIND, funny, and one of those moms that would totally hold the bucket while you were throwing up. LOL.
This was my mom in August 2006, about a year before she died. That's my daughter next to her, who was about 2 months old at the time (& yes, I admit it, totally @ the Ugly Pimply Baby stage). I'm so grateful she got to meet my mom though.
The day I took this picture, mom just lay there w/ the baby. Forever it seemed. Stroking Dex's skin, holding & touching her hands & feet, like she couldn't GET OVER how connected she was to this little life. Of course, my mom actually still knew me most days in 2006. By the time she died, though she was still sweet as pie to the baby & me, she had no idea who we were.
Or hell, who knows? Maybe she did.
Mom... I love you. I miss you. I wish so much you were here to watch Declan grow up. You could have taught me so much about patience, kindness, fun, and most of all how not to get frustrated when my kid is acting like a total 2 year old.
But I want to thank you & grandma Pink for sending her to me just the same. You knew I wasn't gonna make it once you were gone didn't you? You knew what my plans were, didn't you? Crafty gal you were, til the last. She saved my life & by extension, so did you.